Discourses and practices of child-rearing in China: The bio-power of parenting in Beijing

Abstract

Based on 13 months of fieldwork which was conducted among middle-class families in Beijing, this article explores young children's daily bodily practices and juxtaposes these practices with discourses on child-rearing which have gained prominence in post-Mao China. The article aims to demonstrate that the new discourse on childhood, education, and child-rearing, which has been promoted by the Chinese government since the 1980s, does not always correspond to, and sometimes even contradicts, actual practices in Chinese families. The argument here is that this gap stems in large part from the dominant role of grandparents during the early stages of child-rearing, who tend to perpetuate values and practices, such as obedience and dependence, and to maintain a firm grip on the child's body.

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DOI: 10.1177/0920203X13517617
2014 28: 27China Information
Avital Binah-Pollak
parenting in Beijing
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INFORMATION
Discourses and practices of
child-rearing in China: The bio-
power of parenting in Beijing
Avital Binah-Pollak
Tel Aviv University, Israel
Abstract
Based on 13 months of fieldwork which was conducted among middle-class families
in Beijing, this article explores young children’s daily bodily practices and juxtaposes
these practices with discourses on child-rearing which have gained prominence in post-
Mao China. The article aims to demonstrate that the new discourse on childhood,
education, and child-rearing, which has been promoted by the Chinese government
since the 1980s, does not always correspond to, and sometimes even contradicts, actual
practices in Chinese families. The argument here is that this gap stems in large part from
the dominant role of grandparents during the early stages of child-rearing, who tend to
perpetuate values and practices, such as obedience and dependence, and to maintain a
firm grip on the child’s body.
Keywords
childhood in China, Chinese education, new psychological discourse, grandparents,
parenthood, child-rearing practices
The past three decades in China have seen the emergence of a new dominant discourse
on childhood and child-rearing, which highlights children’s individualism and personal
freedom. This new discourse has attracted the attention of several scholars who have
explored the various ways in which such discourse is enacted and implemented in every-
day life. Most of the studies, however, have focused on children who have already
entered the Chinese schooling system, a context that is heavily influenced by the official
policy, and one which promotes the new discourse and aims to shape the child as a new
Corresponding author:
Avital Binah-Pollak, Department of Sociology and Anthropology, Faculty of Social Sciences, Tel-Aviv
University, Ramat-Aviv, Tel-Aviv 69978, Israel.
Email: avital@post.tau.ac.il
517617CIN0010.1177/0920203X13517617China InformationBinah-Pollak
research-article2014
Article
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28 China Information 28(1)
Chinese citizen.1 This research, by contrast, focuses on young children and toddlers in
their family setting before they enter the state educational system, and it emphasizes the
body as an important site of education.
Based on ethnographic work, I show that in contrast to the values promoted in the new
discourse on childhood, many of the ‘traditional’ values still persist in practice. I argue that
this gap derives in large part from the dominant role played by grandparents during the
early stages of child-rearing. Despite being major agents in the child-rearing process,
grandparents have been practically ignored in previous studies on childhood in contempo-
rary China. An interesting exception is Esther Goh’s study on urban families in Xiaman.
Based on a survey conducted among families of schoolchildren, Goh demonstrated that
grandparents spent a significant amount of time with children at home and that their style
of caretaking should not be ignored. Goh argued that instead of focusing on parents as the
most influential force in children’s education, we should look at ‘the “intergenerational
parenting coalition” as a culturally appropriate unit of analysis for understanding child-
rearing within the multigenerational family in China’.2 Following Goh3 and based on my
own ethnographic data, I argue that in contemporary urban China, during children’s early
years and prior to entering any educational setting, grandparents spend a significant amount
of time with their grandchildren and that they exert a major influence on their grandchil-
dren’s education. Therefore, in order to understand early childhood education in contempo-
rary urban China, it is essential to consider the everyday practices of grandparents insofar
as such practices constitute a major part of the children’s educational process.
I examine the manifold tensions and inconsistencies emerging from the particular
sociopolitical circumstances of contemporary China with its amalgam of policies and
discourses. This study explores several major questions: what are the main characteris-
tics of the discourse on childhood that the state has been promoting for the past three
decades?; how do young children in urban China today learn their culture?; do urban
families’ everyday practices correspond to the new ideas and values which are being
promoted by the discourse on childhood?; what conflicts arise from the point of intersec-
tion between traditional and new ideas?; how do these changes influence the child’s
place in his/her family and society; and what are the consequences of the gap between
discourse and actual practices?
In order to understand the way in which early childhood is perceived and practised in
contemporary urban China, the complex system of conceptions and practices of child-
hood and parenthood within their sociopolitical context is examined. Following the ideas
presented by Stephens4 and Scheper-Hughes and Sargent,5 childhood is viewed as part of
the local Chinese political economy as well as a product of global forces. This study is
based on 13 months of fieldwork conducted in Beijing. Most of my observations were
made while spending time in two neighbourhood playgrounds, in the houses of families
I met, and on the square of the building where I lived. In addition to observations, I vide-
otaped more than 30 hours of interactions between caretakers and children in play-
grounds and conducted more than 40 semi-structured interviews with parents,
grandparents, and nannies. All of the interviews were conducted in Mandarin and the
names used throughout this article are pseudonyms. The documented caretaking prac-
tices were of middle-class university-educated Han Chinese living in Beijing, who had
grown up in urban areas.6
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Binah-Pollak 29
Contemporary discourse on childhood and child-rearing
Chinese conceptions of childhood have undergone significant changes throughout
Chinese history.7 Cultural and educational notions regarding children have been influ-
enced mainly by political and economic campaigns and policies as well as by social
changes which China has undergone in the past few decades.8 During the 1980s, the
Chinese government launched a new campaign ‘Raising the quality of the population’
(提高人口素质). At the time, the main aim of the policy was to improve professional
skills and academic and educational achievements in order to advance China’s position
as an economic power in the global arena as well as to build a strong China in relation to
Western countries. The idea was the creation of a new socialist being through the
improvement and development of each person’s ideals, morals, education, and
discipline.9
The term ‘quality education’ (素质教育) originally appeared in educational journals
in the early 1980s to describe the various kinds of educational interventions and practices
aimed at raising the quality of schoolchildren. Several common themes can be identified:
the world should be known objectively, accurately, and scientifically; knowledge requires
certain appropriate attitudes; and the potential within each child can be increased through
hard work and is linked to the social, political, cultural, and economic capital of the
child’s family.10
By the early 1990s, the concept of quality education was widely adopted by educators
and had expanded beyond the confines of formal education to include family-based
child-rearing practices and the broader social climate.11 In 1999, the Ministry of
Education codified and standardized the disparate and often informal education reform
policies throughout China and formulated the policy of quality education.12 One of the
policy’s goals included wiping out illiteracy and introducing nine years of universal
compulsory education at the national level. The document starts off by stating the impor-
tance of enhancing the ‘creative ability of the entire race’, with an emphasis on raising
the quality of the population.13
The use of the word ‘creative’ is linked to the new discourse on childhood, child-
rearing, and education, which the government began promoting in tandem with the pol-
icy of quality education espoused by popular magazines for parents, newspapers,
programmes and advertisements on television, advocating a modern and scientific
approach towards child-rearing.14 In this article, I concentrate on three distinct, yet
closely related, topics which the new discourse promotes: (1) children are autonomous
human beings who should be treated as their parents’ equals; (2) children are unique with
distinct psychological characteristics; and (3) children’s education is the responsibility of
their parents.15
Children are autonomous human beings
As opposed to traditional conceptions which viewed children as ‘subordinate, humble,
and inferior’,16 the new discourse emphasizes the idea that children are autonomous
subjects with rights. The notion of the autonomous child is influenced by the Western
discourse of child liberation and child rights, which emerged in the West in the late
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30 China Information 28(1)
20th century. This discourse recognizes children as moral and legal subjects possessing
basic rights, and it has been significant in refining conceptions of the special charac-
teristics and needs of childhood. The discourse has also contributed to the conception
of children as ‘having agency and as having a voice that must be listened to’.17
Besides tinghua (听话), which is what parents and grandparents say to children when
they insist on obedience from them, guai (乖) is another term they use as well. Rather
than just meaning obedient, the word guai has positive connotations of cuteness and
good manners. As opposed to an ‘obedient guai baby’ (听话的乖宝宝), the mass media
has been popularizing the idea that children are ‘independent individuals’ (独立的个体).
An Internet site, Happy Baby (快乐宝宝), carried an article entitled ‘Respect your
child’s individuality’ (尊重孩子独立的个体), which criticized the fact that in Chinese
culture a child is not praised for his/her independence, only for his/her obedience. The
article emphasized the idea that children should be their own masters and not subordinate
to their parents. According to this article, a child’s independence should be nurtured in
order for the child to become an individual who can make his/her own choice and walk
his/her own path:
Children are not their parents’ subordinates; this is something many parents find hard to accept.
What Chinese parents find important is their child’s school achievements; how their child
behaves in front of other people; whether he/she has eaten enough; whether he/she is warmly
dressed; and whether he/she is healthy. A small child is also a human being. When children
grow up, they have to walk their own path. Children should be provided with choices; then
when they are grown up, they will be confident and independent.18
Other publications focus on the consequences of raising a guai child. A book entitled
Obedient Children Sustain the Worst Damage (乖孩子的伤，最重), which was pub-
lished in Taiwan in February 2010, has become popular in mainland China and is cur-
rently being regarded by Chinese educators as an important book on contemporary
child-rearing and education. The author Li Yaqing hopes that ‘there will be only a few
guai children in the world’. He hopes that all adults will not ‘force children to betray
their souls in order to be good children’.19
The new discourse has also led to a rise in articles offering insights into parent–child
relations. In December 2007, the popular magazine Parents (父母) published a 16-page
article entitled ‘The good parents’ canon’ (好父母圣典). The article, comprising 100
paragraphs, is designed to help parents ‘raise a healthy, happy, mentally strong child’ (培
养一个健康快乐有强大内心动力的孩子). The following demonstrates a shift from the
traditional hierarchy between parents and their child:
Sometimes, your child’s thoughts and yours are not the same.
That is why you need to squat.
See the world from a child’s perspective.
Only then can you better understand your child’s thoughts.20
This excerpt stresses the importance of treating a child as a subject with desires and
autonomous thoughts, whose inner world deserves respect and who can even teach
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Binah-Pollak 31
adults. Squatting on the part of parents is significant because the physical action of bend-
ing down exemplifies a shift in the traditional view of filial piety which children show
towards their parents. It also contrasts with the traditional kowtow in which children bow
down in front of their elders, expressing a change in the conventional one-sided expecta-
tion that children unconditionally respect and obey their parents.
Children are unique with distinct psychological characteristics
As opposed to traditional medical guidebooks focusing mainly on children’s physical
development, contemporary guidebooks focus more on children’s psychological charac-
teristics. In an article about the rise of psychological discourse in China, Orna Naftali
demonstrates how reform-era discourses tend to promote the idea that childhood is a
category distinct from adulthood in terms of children’s ‘natural’ development needs and
that children are entitled to a ‘happy, carefree childhood’.21 According to a number of
publications, to ensure children’s psychological development, parents should pay atten-
tion not only to their children’s physical needs, but also to their emotional needs, thereby
helping them to construct a ‘positive self-image, strong self-confidence, and a sense of
personal worth’.22 In an article in Parents magazine published in January 2008 entitled
‘Different personality, different love’ (不同性格不同爱), parents are encouraged to
understand their child’s personality, not because it has to be changed but in order for their
child to receive the love he/she needs.23
On the ‘Everyday family’s education website’ (天天家教网), there are numerous arti-
cles on the importance of understanding the uniqueness of children’s psychological
development. For example, in an article entitled ‘A child’s psychological development is
comprised of six phases’, the unique psychological development of children is described
as a process ‘with distinct stages’.24 According to the article, each period is marked by
unique characteristics. A child’s psychological development is characterized by order,
with every step connected to the other, and it cannot be reversed or avoided. The article
states that if caretakers were to familiarize themselves with each step of a child’s psycho-
logical development and master it thoroughly, then it would be possible to educate the
child and to plan and organize the course of development of the child’s intelligence and
character.
There are several television programmes which aim at teaching parents about child-
rearing methods, children’s health and nutrition, and child psychology. The popular
programme The Baby Star Plan (宝贝星计划) is aired twice on weekends on Beijing’s
popular animation channel. According to an informant, the mother of a four-year-old
boy, the purpose of the programme is to introduce new educational methods. The pro-
gramme caters to parents with newborn babies and children under the age of five. Each
week, three families compete with each other to carry out different tasks, all of which
have to do with the parents’ familiarity with their child and cooperation between parent
and child. In addition to families, the show includes a professional team of psycholo-
gists, doctors, and kindergarten teachers who specialize in children’s education and
development. After completing the tasks, the professional team members express their
opinions on the parents’ thoughts and actions, and the hosts of the show then summarize
the experts’ opinions. Given that the team’s opinions are considered to be the correct
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32 China Information 28(1)
and accepted way of treating children, the show is in effect sanctioning their messages
to the public.
In one of the episodes, the parents who participated were asked whether they should
hit their child when he/she made a mistake. One of the mothers replied, ‘Although I
know that many people do not think like me, when the child does something wrong, he/
she should be taught a lesson, and so I do think he/she should be hit’. The psychologist
explained:
I think you shouldn’t hit a child. Why? Because a child does not understand the reason why his/
her parents do not allow him/her to do things. A child tries to experience touching things,
hearing sounds, wanting to look at things, touching and discovering with his/her body. It makes
him/her happy. In the process of learning, some problems might come up. These are not
mistakes! Adults see such problems as mistakes, but they are an essential process [emphasis
added] for the child.
The parents taking part in the show were asked about what they could do to show respect
for their child. One of the mothers said, ‘Not respecting the child means speaking to him/
her impolitely. We should address him/her gently, using a soft voice, and consider his/her
opinion.’ The psychologist was asked to express her opinion and she explained:
Our facial expressions should be pleasant and friendly, we should smile, make the child feel
safe, not under pressure. Even though he/she is small, he/she understands our facial expressions,
our thoughts, and the language we use. Our aim is not to make him/her obedient and well-
behaved. Our aim is to reassure a child about his/her thoughts and perceptions.
From the psychologist’s explanations, we learn about the importance of autonomy for
children to experience their world and to experiment. Moreover, as opposed to an empha-
sis on the child’s physical development, the child’s emotions are placed at centre stage
and much attention is paid to his/her psychological development.
The importance of children’s unique development is also evident in the criticism of
the popular practice of the Chinese method of early toilet training. The movie Little
Red Flowers (看上去很美), directed by Zhang Yuan, is critical of this method. It tells
the story of a little boy who is sent to a boarding school for children of preschool age
during the Mao era. The rules of the kindergarten were very strict, but the child refused
to allow his spirit to be affected by the school’s restrictive rules. Toilet training is
depicted as almost inhuman, since all of the children in the kindergarten were required
to use the toilet in public and at fixed times. For example, the children had to move
their bowels in the morning even if they did not feel the urge. Zhang Yuan presents a
picture of children whose bodies are completely docile. He describes Chinese toilet
training as a method that aims to control and discipline even the most natural bodily
urges. In an article published in a Chinese film magazine, the kindergarten in this
movie is described as a place where ‘all the children look like animals in a pasture,
suffering from oppression’.25
The analyses presented in Chinese magazine articles, on Internet websites and televi-
sion programmes about child-rearing and education demonstrate the changes in Chinese
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Binah-Pollak 33
contemporary conceptions about children and child-rearing. As I have showed, the new
discourse which the Chinese government has been promoting for the past three decades
is influenced mainly by Western ideas, and it advocates child-rearing in a scientific and
modern manner. We can see that this discourse supports the idea that children are autono-
mous human beings with distinct psychological characteristics who should be given the
personal freedom to express their inner world. Moreover, children are expected to be
creative, independent, and innovative as opposed to obedient and dependent.
The gap between discourse and actual practices
The new discourse on childhood and child-rearing places the responsibility of child-
rearing and education on parents who are encouraged to raise a happy, independent,
autonomous child. On The Baby Star Plan TV programme described earlier, one of the
episodes discussed the topic of ‘unprofessional parents’. The host explained that parents
are expected to develop professional parenting skills: ‘I think that in order to be an
understanding parent and to become an expert parent, you should first understand your
child; only then you will succeed.’ The parents taking part in the programme were asked
about the kind of behaviour they considered unprofessional. One of the mothers said,
‘There are many things I think my son shouldn’t do, but he doesn’t listen to me … He
cries, so I yell at him and hit him.’ Smiling in embarrassment, she added, ‘I know it is not
the right behaviour, but I can’t control myself.’ The father said that he did not believe in
hitting or yelling at the child, but they were unfamiliar with other methods. According to
the psychologist present, this mother did not really understand a child’s ‘inner thoughts
and feelings’. ‘Why does a child invent stories?,’ asked another mother, to which the
psychologist replied:
From around the age of four, a child’s imagination starts developing and he/she begins to
imagine different things, at times hoping that the things imagined will become real. At this age,
the child mixes reality with imagination. When he/she reaches the age of four and a half or five,
he/she will acknowledge reality and the phenomenon will disappear. Hitting or cursing might
affect his/her health and the ability to imagine.
Thus, the psychologist used a scientific explanation to explain children’s behaviour,
which, according to her, is part of their natural development. Likewise, to induce aware-
ness among parents, the state has been promoting the benefits of ‘explaining by reason-
ing’ and that it is the preferred pedagogical approach for conveying any message to a
child. According to this method, when a child makes a mistake, does something danger-
ous, or does not obey his/her parents, parents should not hit the child or use harsh meas-
ures, but instead should try to resolve the situation by reasoning with the child.
Most media direct their messages only at young parents, while excluding grandpar-
ents from the discourse. When grandparents are mentioned, they are presented as the
others, and their caretaking style is attacked and usually considered backward. In an
article in Parents magazine, entitled ‘What should you do when the gap between your
education method and that of the elderly is too big?’ (和老人的教育差别太大怎么
办?),26 experts recommended that parents should make an attempt to peacefully resolve
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34 China Information 28(1)
the problems they encountered with their own parents. However, one of the professionals
also claimed that it would be very difficult to change grandparents’ old style, advising
parents instead to provide grandparents with magazines about children’s education and
to encourage them to attend special lectures and classes so as to learn the new methods
of child-rearing and education. As I will demonstrate in this article, there is a huge gap
between grandparents’ actual practices and the new ideas promoted by the new discourse.
Rather than treating children as individuals and independent human beings, Beijing
grandparents, who are the child’s main caretakers during the child’s early years, con-
stantly emphasize the supreme significance of physical development and the importance
of a uniform pace of development.
Training the body
Playgrounds and public squares serve as a suitable place to train and improve children’s
physical development. The Beijing Language and Culture University has a big, open
cement yard where grandparents and nannies spend time with children. In this cement
yard, I came to know a local grandfather who took care of his grandchild Xingxing.
Xingxing usually sat in his stroller while his grandfather stood next to him or pushed the
stroller around the square. On one of my visits to the square, I noticed that a strap of
fabric was wrapped around Xingxing’s waist, and his grandfather stood behind him
holding the two ends of the strap in his hands. When Xingxing walked, the fabric
stretched around his stomach and waist. In this way he was able to walk, since his
grandfather was holding the ends of the strap, keeping him balanced. Each time
Xingxing bent over or fell, his grandfather pulled the strap – stretching it – which was
Xingxing’s cue to stand up again. Upon observing Xingxing and his grandfather with
the strap of fabric, I asked the grandfather how old Xingxing was, and he answered that
he was 12 months and 20 days old. Xingxing’s mother, who was standing nearby, over-
heard our conversation and clarified, slightly embarrassed, that Xingxing was not yet 14
months old, implying that her child would probably start walking very soon. Young
mothers rarely used this method of tying a strap of fabric around the child’s waist, and
it was mostly grandparents who did so.27
In line with the emphasis on children’s distinct psychological characteristics, Chinese
paediatricians and psychologists point out that each child has his/her own natural pace of
development. For example, child experts constantly underline that it is not important
whether a child starts walking at an early age. A popular guidebook for parents encour-
ages them to gradually train their child to walk at his or her own pace.28 In a parents’
forum called Baby Tree (宝宝树), an article on children’s walking age stated, ‘Every
child’s development is not the same since each child is unique, and learning to walk is
definitely not an exception.’29 While the new discourse emphasizes the importance of
individualism and an individual pace of development, in practice grandparents con-
stantly encourage children to behave according to certain norms.
The Chinese method of early toilet training is another example of the importance of
training and improving the body. Although there are several recent medical studies con-
ducted by Chinese doctors on nocturnal enuresis and urinary control,30 very few contem-
porary studies focus on the relationship between toilet training and cultural or other
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Binah-Pollak 35
aspects of caretaking. In his study about life in a Beijing commune, Norman A. Chance
briefly described the Chinese method of toilet training, arguing that in contrast to the way
in which children are weaned, toilet training is undertaken in a ‘more leisurely manner’.
Chance stated that ‘such education is successfully completed by the age of two’,31 but
neglected to show how this practice is embodied, nor did he specify its connection to
educational and cultural ideas regarding child-rearing and education. The two volumes
Preschool in Three Different Cultures32 and Preschool in Three Different Cultures
Revisited33 do not touch on the process of toilet training for young toddlers. They do,
however, discuss in graphic detail the way in which kindergarten children were required
to go to the toilet according to fixed times set by the teacher.
From my observations and conversations with young Beijing parents and grandpar-
ents, the most common conception is that a child should be toilet trained as early as pos-
sible. Even though disposable diapers are not a new item on the shelves of Beijing’s
supermarkets, few of the parents, grandparents, or nannies whom I interviewed used
diapers for their child on a regular basis, especially during the day. While conducting my
fieldwork, I was often criticized by our elderly neighbours for the fact that my one-year-
old daughter was still wearing diapers. Most families that use diapers do so only during
the child’s first five months. Some families use diapers only at night, when it is more
difficult to be mindful of the child’s movements and sounds. Families that do not use
disposable diapers usually wrap a small diaper made of cotton around the child’s waist
until the baby is about five months old. After that, babies and toddlers wear open-crotch
pants34 in order to make toilet training easy for the caretaker and for the children.
The time when training begins varies from family to family, but most families begin
when the baby is three months old. Chinese toilet training means holding a baby by the hips
over a potty or by the edge of the road and whistling softly to imitate the trickling sound of
running water. Grandparents usually carry the baby in their arms, which familiarizes them
with the noises, body movements, and facial expressions the child makes. Grandmothers
told me that they can ‘feel’ whenever their young grandchild is about to relieve himself or
herself, which they said is indicated by a movement or a change in the baby’s face.
While it is extremely common to see children relieving themselves by the side of the
road or at playgrounds, they rarely empty their bowels outside, even when they are not
wearing diapers. Grandparents and parents usually set fixed times for children to do so.
According to Liu Hong, one of my informants, children are expected to move their bow-
els in the morning after they wake up. She explained that upon awakening, the child is
given warm water to drink on an empty stomach and that ‘after a while, he/she will
acquire the habit and will naturally feel the urge to go to the toilet’. When I asked her
what happens if a child does not want to go to the toilet in the mornings, she said it can-
not happen because ‘he will also get used to it; it is not possible that he is unable to move
his bowels’. A mother of a four-year-old boy explained to me that it is a Chinese ‘custom’
rooted in traditional Chinese medicine practice. According to this custom, the body will
be healthy only after it rids itself of bodily waste. Many people whom I interviewed or
talked with in China thought that moving one’s bowels every morning is healthiest for
the body, describing it as ‘the most normal behaviour’ and a ‘good habit’.
The Chinese practice of early toilet training highlights two important points. First, the
way in which children are toilet trained demonstrates that the child’s body is the centre
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36 China Information 28(1)
of education. Instead of speaking to the child and verbally explaining the importance of
toilet training, caretakers physically train the child, and as time passes, the practice
becomes embodied in the child. Second, such a practice carried out by caretakers to train
the body from an early age according to a fixed timetable contradicts the new discourse
which emphasizes each child’s unique character and individual pace of development.
Limiting the child
Yuanyuan, a one-year-old girl, was standing while leaning against a bench in the play-
ground. After a few attempts, Yuanyuan managed to climb onto the bench and began
crawling. Her grandmother seemed concerned about her actions and placed her back on
her feet to stand on the ground. After a few seconds of supporting her body with her arms
while hanging onto the bench, Yuanyuan got tired and sank to her knees, so that they
touched the ground. The grandmother noticed and said, ‘We have a rule; pants cannot get
dirty, get up.’ Then with one hand, she held Yuanyuan’s upper arm and picked her up
once again so that she would stand on her feet.
When Yuanyuan picked up one of the pens lying on the bench, her grandmother took
the pen out of her hand. Yuanyuan picked it up again and, using her other hand, reached
the back of her shaved head and rubbed it. Her grandmother immediately admonished,
‘Your hand is dirty!’ Yuanyuan then tried to rub her face, but her grandmother stopped
her and repeated, ‘Your hand is dirty, look at your hand.’ She then tried to rub her fore-
head, but her grandmother said ‘hey’, clapped her hands twice, and pushed Yuanyuan’s
hand down. After repeating this routine a few more times, her grandmother seemed to
give up. But when Yuanyuan tried to put her leg on the bench again, the grandmother
pulled her away and put her back on her feet.
This episode serves as another example to illustrate the gap between grandparents’
behaviour and what the new discourse advocates. By physically restricting Yuanyuan’s
actions, her grandmother conveyed the idea that sitting on the ground, touching ‘dirty’
objects, and in general children getting themselves dirty are forbidden. The grandmother
prevented Yuanyuan from touching her own body, sitting on the ground, crawling on the
bench, and exploring her new surroundings. The grandmother spoke very few words to her
granddaughter and monitored her every step. Rather than allowing personal freedom, lis-
tening to the child’s wishes, and explaining by reasoning, as the new discourse on child-
hood and child-rearing promotes, the grandmother ignored her granddaughter’s thoughts
and wishes. Instead of encouraging the child to experience new things as part of her natural
development, the grandmother put a much greater emphasis on the child’s hygiene.
Such behaviour is very common among grandparents, usually resulting in limiting the
child’s sphere of movement and activity. Most grandparents I met also did not allow
children to crawl on the ground outside. To quote a local Beijing grandmother, ‘Of course
children crawl on the ground; crawling is very good for the child’s physical develop-
ment, but not on the ground outside. They crawl in the house since the ground outside is
very dirty and crawling on it is not good for the child.’ Although hygiene was very
important to both parents and grandparents, in some cases young parents allowed their
child to touch things that were lying on the ground and even to get dirty – something that
older people rarely allowed.
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Binah-Pollak 37
The gap between the conceptions of young parents and grandparents was demon-
strated on one of my visits to a Beijing playground, where I encountered a mother and
her 10-month-old baby girl. The mother held her daughter in her arms and walked around
the playground. The little girl had not yet learned to walk, and was not crawling on the
cement ground. I asked the mother whether she allowed her daughter to crawl, and she
told me that her daughter only crawled at home. ‘She does not like to crawl outside,’ she
said. However, after a minute or so, the mother and her friend offered the little girl some
dry leaves which had fallen from the trees. The little girl bent over and started to crawl
in order to pick up some more leaves, at which time her mother allowed her to remain on
the ground.
One of the grandmothers standing nearby immediately said ‘dirty’. The mother told
her that she allowed her daughter to crawl on the ground. However, after only a few
seconds, she picked her up and started once again to walk with the child held in her arms.
After a few minutes, her mother-in-law arrived and took the little girl from her. Now
walking with the help of her grandmother, who was holding the girl’s upper arm, the two
approached a pile of leaves. The little girl bent down, wanting to touch the leaves that her
mother just a few minutes earlier had given to her. Her grandmother quickly picked her
up, saying to her, ‘Dirty, let’s go to the other side.’
The situation just described demonstrates two important points. The first is the moth-
er’s ambivalence. Initially, she stated that her daughter did not like to crawl on the
ground, but after only a few minutes, she put her on the ground to touch dry leaves. When
a grandmother commented that the ground was dirty, she disagreed with her and claimed
that she approved. Second, we can see the difference between the two grandparents and
the young mother. Both grandparents did not approve of children crawling on the ground
and touching objects they considered dirty, while the young mother allowed her daughter
to experiment despite her ambivalence.
The following account further illustrates a change in the attitude of young parents.
One day my daughter was playing with a pile of sand which was left at the entrance of
our building. A few grandparents who were nearby immediately cried, ‘Dirty, dirty!’ and
added that it was not good for her. After a while, several children joined in and started
playing with the sand. Their parents did not object and even suggested that they took
their shoes off. I remarked to our neighbour that the children were really enjoying them-
selves, and he replied, ‘If the children are happy, I am happy.’
Many mothers with whom I spoke told me that grandparents followed an old-
fashioned approach; grandparents were too protective and did not allow children to move
around freely. For example, a mother of a four-month-old baby girl told me that she was
not happy about the fact that her mother-in-law would be taking care of her child when
she returned to work after maternity leave. She said that her mother-in-law did not agree
about giving her daughter a bath every day because she was afraid that she would get
sick, and in the winter she dressed her daughter in too many layers. She declared, ‘Usually
grandmothers do not allow children to move around. They are too old-fashioned. I will
never go to her for advice; their opinions are too old-fashioned. If I have a problem, I
search the Internet, read books.’
Mothers I interviewed stressed that grandparents were too protective and that as a
result Chinese children were dependent. In a visit to the Beijing Language and Culture
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38 China Information 28(1)
University’s playground, I met a mother who was holding her three-month-old baby girl
in her arms. While we were talking, she was watching my daughter who was running
around the playground. She said, ‘I think that Western education is much better than the
education in China. You can see that Chinese children are too dependent. Western chil-
dren are so independent … look at how your daughter plays by herself. Look at that girl
(she pointed at a two-year-old baby girl), how closely she sticks to her mother … look at
your daughter, she is so independent.’ The mother explained that after she returned to
work, she had no choice but to allow her mother-in-law to take care of her daughter. She
planned to put her daughter in kindergarten when she turned two and a half so that her
daughter would not be under the influence of her grandmother. Several other mothers
with whom I spoke also stated that it was not good for the child to spend a lot of time
with his/her grandparents but that they did not have any other choice.
Mothers expressed the wish that their child would grow up to be independent. A
mother I met in a Beijing playground told me that she did not want her parents-in-law to
take care of him and that she planned to return to work only when the child turned two.
While her son was pushing the swing, she explained, ‘Because grandparents are afraid
that their grandchild will get hurt, they will never let him/her play like this. It is very
important to me that he grows up to be open-minded and independent. I really don’t mind
that he touches things; I don’t tell him that everything is dirty. I let him touch everything.’
She said that unlike grandparents, obedience is not important to her, and added, ‘I let him
do whatever he wants.’
By not allowing children to touch dirty objects or to experiment on their own, grand-
parents not only restrict the child’s actions and will, but also demand obedience. My
observations of grandparents’ caretaking methods revealed that during the child’s first
years, grandparents were very concerned with obedience. Indeed, the importance of obe-
dience came up in various conversations that I conducted with young mothers who
argued that grandmothers tended to demand obedience from their grandchildren. Liu
Hong told me how important it was to her mother-in-law that her son Yueyue was obedi-
ent. Yueyue’s grandmother often admonished him, ‘You must obey your grandmother.’
When Yueyue asked her why, she answered, ‘Because your grandmother has eaten more
salt than you have eaten rice, and because your grandmother is much older than you, so
you need to listen to her. Only if you obey, then you will be guai.’
The everyday practices that I documented – such as carrying children around, not
allowing them to crawl outside, and preventing them from experiencing and experiment-
ing as they wished – are representative examples of how children’s personal physical
freedom is monitored and limited. Although the children in this study were already able
to understand what was being said to them and were able to express themselves, they
were usually not given a chance to communicate their thoughts and emotions.
Grandparents generally did not try to talk to their grandchildren, ask them what they
want, or explain the reason for their requests, using only simple and straightforward
words, such as ‘no’, ‘dirty’, ‘stop moving’. When they wanted the child to walk, play,
ease him- or herself or move bowels, they directed the child by physically moving and
leading him/her from one place to another and by pulling his/her hand away from things
that should not be touched. Grandparents were typically very worried about their grand-
child’s safety and comfort and placed great emphasis on the child’s physical condition. If
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Binah-Pollak 39
the child was not carried around, most of the time grandparents kept very close to the
child, holding the child’s upper arm or touching his/her back while they walked.
The approach adopted by grandparents is in sharp contrast to the contemporary dis-
course about childhood and child-rearing, which emphasizes the importance of the
child’s unique characteristics and emotions. Moreover, as opposed to the new discourse
which stresses that obedience should not be the main aim of education and that children
should taught by reasoning, in practice grandparents and young children share a hierar-
chical relationship based on the assumption that young children should obey their
grandparents.
Concluding thoughts: ‘A tree transplanted from the West
into Confucian soil will have difficulty taking root’35
While we are witnessing a change in the educational system, not just in terms of rheto-
ric but also in practice,36 there is a significant continuity with ‘traditional’ practices
prior to children’s admission into kindergarten and school. As I have argued, while the
new liberal discourse emphasizes the importance of individualism and creativity, local
Beijing grandparents, who in most cases are the main educators during their grand-
child’s first years, tend to perpetuate values and practices which reinforce obedience
and lack of independence. The gap between discourse and actual practices is all the
more pertinent in view of the fact that more than 60 million children are left behind in
villages by their parents who are labour migrants. While the new discourse emphasizes
the importance of parents as the main caretakers, tens of millions of children are being
taken care of by their grandparents, relatives or neighbours and, according to reports,
in many cases they are left unattended. The huge gap between the new discourse and
actual practices during a child’s early years carries major social, political and eco-
nomic implications.
In a speech in 1998, President Jiang Zemin stated that ‘The construction of a spiritual
civilization ultimately demands raising the quality of the entire nation, [and] developing
the new socialist person with ideals, morality, education and discipline.’37 In 2012, at the
18th National Congress of the Communist Party of China, Hu Jintao linked the future of
the nation with the ‘creative vitality of society’. The idea of improving oneself for the
nation’s sake is not a new phenomenon in China. The classical Confucian idea that
humans are malleable and educable has persisted and been embodied in modern initia-
tives in education. Marxist interpretations of human nature as well as revolutionary ideas
have created practices in which ‘the politically engaged were constantly called upon to
strive for higher levels of self-cultivation, sometimes in connection with practices of
criticism and self-criticism in rectification campaigns, but also and always as a continu-
ing call for improvement’.38
As opposed to earlier socialist practices of self-formation, the goal of quality educa-
tion is to create an independent self-evaluating child, that is, to teach children to be
competent, self-aware subjects who monitor their own behaviour, feelings, and inter-
actions with others.39 However, the new discourse contains contradictory messages
and is inconsistent about the way in which children should be treated. While the new
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40 China Information 28(1)
discourse promotes ideas such as autonomy, individualism, and treating each child as
a unique human being, in practice children are expected to act according to the spirit
embodied by quality education and to become excellent students who contribute to the
nation’s future. Children are obliged to study for very long hours and as a result they
experience great stress, while their personal freedom to choose their own life course is
very limited.
The new ideas and values that the state has been promoting for the past three decades
are set in the context of a discourse involving the nation’s future and the expansion of
China’s power in the global arena. Several recent studies focusing primarily on market
forces as the main influence on children in contemporary China suggest that the advance-
ment of the idea of the ‘autonomous child’ in China is closely linked to the global domi-
nance of ‘neoliberal governmentality’.40 In other words, similar to what is expected of
children across the world, Chinese children are also expected to be flexible, independent,
and self-governing and to be able to successfully take part in the global economy.41
Orna Naftali argues that the ‘individual rights’ discourse, which has emerged in China
in the past few decades, is a privilege given to the people by the Chinese Communist
Party and is not understood as a ‘natural human right’.42 This raises inevitable questions
such as whether children in contemporary China are empowered, whether they are raised
to become independent human beings, and whether they exert agency. Moreover, it also
questions whether or not children can fulfil the targets set for them by the state, namely,
to be more creative and innovative for the nation’s sake. While Chinese leaders and edu-
cators emphasize the importance of innovation and creativity as well as new education,
grandparents continue to dominate the early stages of child-rearing and to stress obedi-
ence, a uniform pace of physical development and hierarchy. Therefore, it is questiona-
ble whether the new socialist person will be able to acquire the traits promoted by the
state. The gap between the new educational discourse and actual practices resembles the
gap between actual practices and the government rhetoric on other issues such as the
environment, human rights, democracy, and so on. In other words, the new neoliberal
tendencies in Chinese education should not be taken as a fact. Moreover, the apparent
gap between the educational discourse and actual practices may also suggest that the
building of a creative and innovative society, or even some form of a political change,
might still be far off.
The connection between education and the nation’s future resonates in one of many
comments posted in reaction to ‘The Chinese dream’ speech by China’s new leader Xi
Jinping: ‘As long as we can achieve the renewal of the Chinese nation, by realizing the
“Chinese dream”, our own dreams will be realized.’ Yet, inconsistencies in the new dis-
course about childhood and education, as well as the huge gap between discourse and
actual practices, raise the important question of whose dream Xi Jinping is referring to:
the child’s, the family’s or the state’s?
Notes
I am truly indebted to Dr Tsipy Ivry and Dr Nimrod Baranovitch for their support and guidance
during this research. I am grateful to Dr Baranovitch for his valuable comments on earlier versions
of this article. I would also like to thank my two anonymous readers and China Information for
their constructive and useful comments.
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Binah-Pollak 41
1. See, for example, Terry Woronov, Transforming the future: ‘Quality’ children and the
Chinese nation (PhD diss., University of Chicago, 2006) about schoolchildren in Beijing;
Vanessa L. Fong, Only Hope: Coming of Age under China’s One-Child Policy, Stanford, CA:
Stanford University Press, 2004, about adolescence in Dalian; Orna Naftali, Reforming the
child: Childhood, citizenship and subjectivity in contemporary China (PhD diss., University
of Santa Barbara, 2007) about schoolchildren in Shanghai; Joseph Tobin, Yeh Hsueh, and
Mayumi Karasawa, Preschool in Three Cultures Revisited: China, Japan, and the United
States, Chicago and London: The University of Chicago Press, 2009, about children in kin-
dergartens in Kunming.
2. Esther C. L. Goh, China’s One-Child Policy and Multiple Caregiving, London and New York:
Routledge, 2011, 8. See also Berenice Nyland et al., Grandparents as educators and carers in
China, Journal of Early Childhood Research 7(1), 2009: 46–57.
3. Ibid.
4. Sharon Stephens (ed.), Children and the Politics of Culture, Princeton, NJ: Princeton
University Press, 1995.
5. Nancy Scheper-Hughes and Carolyn Sargent, Introduction: The cultural politics of childhood,
in Nancy Scheper-Hughes and Carolyn Sargent (eds) Small Wars: The Cultural Politics of
Childhood, Berkeley: University of California Press, 1998, 1.
6. Following Teresa Kuan, the families I refer to are mainly double-income families, most of
whom own an apartment and a car, and have college degrees. Teresa Kuan, ‘The heart says
one thing but the hand does another’: A story about emotion-work, ambivalence and popular
advice for parents, The China Journal, no. 65, 2011: 77–100.
7. For a discussion regarding notions of childhood during imperial China, see, for example,
John Dardess, Childhood in pre-modern China, in Joseph M. Hawes and N. Ray Hiner (eds)
Children in Historical and Comparative Perspectives: An International Handbook and
Research Guide, New York: Greenwood Press, 1991; Anne Behnke Kinney (ed.), Chinese
Views of Childhood, Honolulu: University of Hawaii Press, 1995; Anne Behnke Kinney,
Representations of Childhood and Youth in Early China, Stanford, CA: Stanford University
Press, 2004. For historical studies focusing on the changes in the concept of childhood during
the Republican era, see, for example, Mary Ann Farquhar, Children’s Literature in China:
From Lu Xun to Mao Zedong, Armonk, NY: M. E. Sharpe, 1999 and Susan Glosser, Chinese
Visions of Family and State, 1915–1953, Berkeley: University of California Press, 2003; and
for a discussion about changes in notions of childhood in post-Mao China, see, for example,
Susan Greenhalgh and Edwin A. Winckler, Governing China’s Population: From Leninist
to Neoliberal Biopolitics, Stanford, CA: Stanford University Press, 2005 and Jun Jing (ed.),
Feeding China’s Little Emperors: Food, Children and Social Change, Stanford, CA: Stanford
University Press, 2000.
8. Naftali, Reforming the child.
9. Ellen Judd, The Chinese Women’s Movement between State and Market, Stanford, CA:
Stanford University Press, 2000, 22.
10. Woronov, Transforming the future, 34–6.
11. Ibid.
12. Ibid., 31–2.
13. State Council, Mianxiang 21 shiji jiaoyu zhenxing xingdong jihua (Action plan for the vigor-
ous development of education in the 21st century), in 2003–2007 nian jiaoyu zhenxing xing-
dong jihua (Action plan for the vigorous development of education between 2003 and 2007),
Beijing: Zhongguo fazhi chubanshe, 2004 (1999), in Kuan, ‘The heart says one thing but the
hand does another’, 80–1.
14. Naftali, Reforming the child.
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42 China Information 28(1)
15. In order to learn about the values promoted by the new discourse, I analysed academic texts,
popular magazines, and guidebook for parents, as well as two popular television programmes.
16. See, for example, Naftali, Reforming the child; Tobin, Hsueh, and Karasawa, Preschool in
Three Cultures Revisited. On top of changes in the educational system, we also witness a
shift in the way in which the PLA is presented in contemporary children’s toys and animation
productions. In line with the new discourse on childhood and education, young protagonists
in PLA-civilian productions are portrayed as innocent, in contrast to the images of children
and youth during the Maoist era; see Naftali’s article in this issue, Marketing war and the mili-
tary to children and youth in China: Little Red Soldiers in the digital age, China Information
28(1): 3–25.
17. David Archard, Children: Rights and Childhood, 2nd edn., London and New York: Routledge,
2004, 58.
18. Fumu yao zunzhong haizi duli de geti (Parents should respect their child’s individual-
ity), Qinqin baobei (Cute baby), 2010, http://www.pretybaby.com/yuer/jiaoyu/n-101231/
3c24b425-108b-48f2-a1d0-8540fd136fc9.htm, accessed 30 June 2010.
19. Li Yaqing, Guai haizi de shang, zui zhong (Obedient children sustain the worst damage),
Beijing: Shoudu shifan daxue chubanshe, 2010.
20. Hao fumu shengdian (The good parents’ canon), Fumu (Parents), no. 12, 2007: 87–105.
21. Naftali, Recovering childhood: Play, pedagogy, and the rise of psychological knowledge in
contemporary urban China, Modern China 36(6): 589–616.
22. Naftali, Reforming the child, 156–7.
23. Fu Di, Butong gexing butong ai (Different personality, different love), Fumu (Parents), no. 1,
2008: 36–9.
24. Tiantian jiajiao wang (Everyday family’s education website), Ertong xinli fazhan you liu ge
jieduan (A child’s psychological development is comprised of six phases), 2012, http://www.
ttgood.com/info/article_1523.htm, accessed 10 July 2012.
25. Guangying Song, Weiguan quanli de shijue moxing (Visual model of authority), Dianying
yishu (The art of films), no. 5, 2006: 84–5.
26. He laoren jiaoyu chabie tai da zenme ban? (What should you do when the gap between your
education method and that of older people is too big?), Fumu (Parents), no. 6, 2007: 108.
27. Although mothers did not usually use this method, they were very concerned about the
age their child would start walking, and they saw it as a very important step in the child’s
development.
28. Shufeng Dai, 0-6 sui baobao chengzhang jiance bao dian (A guide for monitoring the devel-
opment of 0–6-year-old children), Beijing: Beijing chubanshe, 2007, 82.
29. Baobao yiban shenme shihou hui zoulu? (When does an infant usually start walking?),
Baobao shu (Baby tree), 2010, http://www.babytree.com/ask/detail/35504, accessed 28
February 2010.
30. Xianchen Liu et al., Prevalence and risk factors of behavioral and emotional problems among
Chinese children aged 6 through 11 years, Journal of the American Academy of Child &
Adolescent Psychiatry 38(6), 1999: 708–15; Xianchen Liu et al., Attaining nocturnal urinary
control, nocturnal enuresis, and behavioral problems in Chinese children aged 6 through 16
years, Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry 39(12), 2000:
1557–64.
31. Norman A. Chance, China’s Urban Villagers: Life in a Beijing Commune, New York: Holt,
Rinehart and Winston, 1984, 66–7.
32. Joseph J. Tobin, David Y. H. Wu, and Dana H. Davidson, Preschool in Three Cultures: Japan,
China, and the United States, New Haven, CT: Yale University Press, 1989.
33. Tobin, Hsueh, and Karasawa, Preschool in Three Cultures Revisited.
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Binah-Pollak 43
34. Boys continue to wear such pants until the age of four. Little girls usually wear these pants
until they are 18 months old.
35. Quoting an early childhood educator from Yunnan Normal University, in Tobin, Hsueh, and
Karasawa, Preschool in Three Cultures Revisited, 89.
36. See, for example, Naftali, Reforming the child; Tobin, Hsueh, and Karasawa, Preschool in
Three Cultures Revisited.
37. Judd, The Chinese Women’s Movement between State and Market, 20.
38. Ibid.
39. Thomas Dunk, Remaking the working class: Experience, class consciousness, and the indus-
trial adjustment process, American Ethnologist 29(4), 2002: 878–900.
40. Ann Anagnost, The corporeal politics of quality (suzhi), Public Culture 16(2), 2004: 189–
208; Greenhalgh and Winckler, Governing China’s Population.
41. Orna Naftali, Empowering the child: Children’s rights, citizenship and the state in contempo-
rary China, The China Journal, no. 61, 2009: 80.
42. Naftali, Recovering childhood.
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